What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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