My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
