My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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