At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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