It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
