I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
