Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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