You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
