Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
