You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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