4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
