After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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