You just made me feel so damn special
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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