her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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