Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
