Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
