I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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