break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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