Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Randomize