Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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