and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
That's when you crack a 10am beer
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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