whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
