I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
