nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
