Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.

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(706): View more from Georgia

thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.

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(519): View more from Ontario

I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents

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(502): View more from Kentucky

to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary

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(940): View more from Texas

I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.

(254): View more from Texas

It's 2 pm....

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(559): View more from California

I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."

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(816): View more from Missouri

He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.

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(218): View more from Minnesota

I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.

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(315): View more from New York

She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV

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