She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
