On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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