She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
