I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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