She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
