If i could tip my vagina, i would.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
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