My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Someone shit on the floor
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
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