Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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