she looked like the bat from fern gully.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Randomize
