areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Randomize
