is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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