Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
