Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
