Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
The air was thick with penises
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
