Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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