The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
