I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
