...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
