Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
