Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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