grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
