I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
