dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Randomize
