I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
