Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
